The Aposematic Leader

“There is a weird belief especially in corporate circles, that if one is busy then one is productive. Busy-ness is seen as a virtue. In a leader, projecting this behaviour can be read as ‘keep away’.”

Aposematism refers to the strategy adopted by some animals to have bright colours, spines or other indicators to potential predators, basically saying “Keep Away”.

Two behaviours are on top of the pile in my view:

• The Forbidding Demeanour
• I’m Busy, Can’t You See?

In this, the second part, I’ll discuss “I’m Busy, Can’t You See?”

Part 2: I’m Busy, Can’t You See?

The second frequently recurring aposematic behaviour is the sense leaders give to the people around them that they are busy, overloaded, with no time at all to spare for any interaction.

Their schedules are chock-a-block full. They run from one meeting to another. They are constantly on their phones (some have multiple phones, to rub the point in further).

Depending on the culture of the organisation, and their seniority, leaders may also have PAs or secretaries who act as physical barriers, not easily allowing people into the “hallowed presence” of the Busy One. Only if someone has something very important to say or ask can they get access – and that too for a very small window of time.

Others have published online calendars, which are always fully booked, with very little squeeze room for any freewheeling interaction. With the widespread prevalence of WFH/ hybrid models of working, this issue is exacerbated to a huge degree.

Busy-ness = Virtue?

One possible reason why this type of aposematic leader may do this is the weird belief that if one is busy then one is productive. Busy-ness is seen as a virtue. Busy-ness is equated to being productive. And on the contrary, people who have “free time” are seen as being lazy, or even superfluous to requirements.

There’s an old training activity (been around for decades) where individuals are given a sheet of paper with a list of numbered instructions and are told “You have only one minute to complete this”. The list starts with two simple instructions – “Read everything first”, and “Write your name on the top left of this page”) but gets more involved as one goes ahead (e.g. “Stand up and say aloud – I am nearly finished”). At the end, the last instruction is “Now that you have read all the instructions, do only #1 and #2 in this list”.

In all groups that I have worked with over three decades, people invariably start acting on the instructions without waiting to read all of them first (although that’s the first instruction!). There is a seductive pull that action extends – far stronger than the allure of sitting quietly and reading everything before doing anything.

Impact is problematic

Whether intentional or not, engagement is blocked with such behaviours. For many reasons that is concerning:

• There is huge value in engagement. People today are smarter than they were in the past. The magnitude of impact of the internet, social media and now ChatGPT on people and society is undoubtedly huge. Information is at one’s fingertips, literally. But for all this smartness and impact to be leveraged within the context of an organisation, even a team – engagement is crucial. Blocking off that source of collective meaning-making makes no sense at all.
• Generation-based gaps in understanding need to be reduced. I’ve spoken with so many leaders who are worried about “How to manage the current generation?” (I’ve lost track of the alphabets). Clearly, there is a desire to understand them better, understand their philosophy of life, understand their stances related to work and work-life balance, their priorities and concerns. Any leader should be looking for ways to engage more, understand more – and not throttle opportunities to engage.
• Building a culture of belonging is taking centre stage. Today’s post-pandemic world is forcing organisations to battle with high attrition rates. Building a sense of belongingness is becoming increasingly difficult – all the more so with practices such as WFH. In such times, it is crucial to build a culture of engagement and inclusion, and leaders would do well to foster interaction rather than limit it.

On the other hand, freewheeling conversations, shooting the breeze, having agenda-free meetings just to catch up and share + listen are all powerful ways to build relationships, expand horizons, make connections, even just ‘be human’. In modern terminology it is called ‘hanging’ – although the name sounds bizarre, it’s a wonderful social ritual.

The aposematic leader living “I’m Busy Can’t You See” misses out on all this.

The dangerous part is that this aposematism can extend to personal relationships and the family too! I saw an anonymous quote on social media: “In 25 years the only ones who will remember how busy you were will be the family you never had time for.” True, dat.

Solutions

Here are just a few ways to get you going/ thinking … there are lots more.

• Be aware of how ‘forbidding’ you come across as. Work with a coach to identify and implement changes in practices and beliefs by which you come across as being less “forbidding” and more “engaging”.
• Prioritise “engagement” as a goal/ activity for you and your role as a leader.
• Schedule “agenda-free” open discussion times with team members – singly and/ or in small groups. Just shoot the breeze with them.
• Force yourself to switch off your phone when you meet/ engage. Pretend you’re on a flight. Set up Voice Mail on your phone, so that important callers can be got back to.
• Walk around, chat up with people where they work, spend time at the “bottom of the business” – you’ll understand the ground realities, your employees, and likely even customers much better.

Author – Anand Kasturi, CFI Coach